The Time Agency offered me my missing memories back if I could get the vat away long enough for them to scan. Then the bastards changed the deal on me.
They say they'll return the vat if I bring them Reinette. They don't want an angry Time Lord on their case and neither do I. They say all they want is to do some scans of the mother. Sure. You can see why I need your help, yours and Reinette's. Rose's, too, if she's up for it.
Fucking shagging hell, Jack, it's only two fucking years! They were probably boring years! You'd steal my baby for two boring years where you probably just sat about watching television?
Why the fuck would anyone want to scan Reinette? She's not that interesting. Anyway, I don't want to let them do that now, because they've pissed me the fuck off. I might even be forced to use strong fucking language of something. Useless bastards.
I have a plan! My plan is this: you get my baby back, or I'll castrate you and tell everyone you have syphillis.
Don't bother. And don't call me darling. I have a bone to pick with you. You have been utterly useless at getting back our TimeVatBaby, and I am beginning to think you just spent nearly two days in 19th C England shagging, and not getting anywhere at all.
Did you do it in your mother's house, eh? Did you? Did it turn you on? Mummy in the next room, you being a naughty boy? Were you thinking about her when you came?
You're a sick fuck, you really are. I'm going off with this handsome Jack guy. I'll deal with you later.
We looked for Fred! Everywhere! We even went to Penelope's house and looked around in scary dark corridors in case we found our beloved vat-baby! And you know how terrified I am of that woman, so you can see how much I must care about our baby to have done that.
*strangulated moan* That is the hottest thing you've ever said. Obviously, you are completely wrong about it all, though. Say it again? Please? I love you and so on.
Have I ever, ever lied to you, oh apple of my hearts' desire?
Not that I'm turned on my this, but if I was I would want to say how wonderful I think you are. You're all stern and maternal and I like that so much. Except obviously I don't. Spankings may be required, though. Just in general.
I may well spank you later. Just to teach you a lesson. You know Mummy doesn't like you being a dirty boy in her house. And you've been a dirty, filthy boy, haven't you? Tell me the truth.
*moans* Oh, God, I'm such a terrible person. *pounces*
I won't mess it up! We'll save Fred and then raise her to be as clever as me and as confident as you only less slutty. Oh, should we have her neutered just in case?
*spanks* Did I say you could pounce? Hmmm? What have I taught you about being polite and asking nicely? *spanks again* You're a very, very naughty boy.
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timeasmymeasure
no subject
Date: 2006-07-03 08:16 am (UTC)They say they'll return the vat if I bring them Reinette. They don't want an angry Time Lord on their case and neither do I. They say all they want is to do some scans of the mother. Sure. You can see why I need your help, yours and Reinette's. Rose's, too, if she's up for it.
We need a plan.
no subject
Date: 2006-07-03 08:23 am (UTC)Why the fuck would anyone want to scan Reinette? She's not that interesting. Anyway, I don't want to let them do that now, because they've pissed me the fuck off. I might even be forced to use strong fucking language of something. Useless bastards.
I have a plan! My plan is this: you get my baby back, or I'll castrate you and tell everyone you have syphillis.
And stop shagging Penelope, it's just wrong.
no subject
Date: 2006-07-03 08:29 am (UTC)First you call me useless, now I'm dull as well?
Oh you are just cruising for a slapping off me, buttmunch.
no subject
Date: 2006-07-03 08:31 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-07-03 08:49 am (UTC)I have a bone to pick with you.
You have been utterly useless at getting back our TimeVatBaby, and I am beginning to think you just spent nearly two days in 19th C England shagging, and not getting anywhere at all.
Did you do it in your mother's house, eh? Did you? Did it turn you on? Mummy in the next room, you being a naughty boy? Were you thinking about her when you came?
You're a sick fuck, you really are. I'm going off with this handsome Jack guy. I'll deal with you later.
no subject
Date: 2006-07-03 08:57 am (UTC)*strangulated moan* That is the hottest thing you've ever said. Obviously, you are completely wrong about it all, though. Say it again? Please? I love you and so on.
DON'T LEAVE ME!
no subject
Date: 2006-07-03 09:06 am (UTC)You have such issues, my dearest. *is slightly turned on* You've been a bad boy. Mummy may need to spank you for being so naughty.
I'M GOING TO GET OUR BABY!!!
I'd never leave you, you filthy alien tease.no subject
Date: 2006-07-03 09:14 am (UTC)Not that I'm turned on my this, but if I was I would want to say how wonderful I think you are. You're all stern and maternal and I like that so much. Except obviously I don't. Spankings may be required, though. Just in general.
I'LL HELP YOU!
no subject
Date: 2006-07-03 09:24 am (UTC)I may well spank you later. Just to teach you a lesson. You know Mummy doesn't like you being a dirty boy in her house. And you've been a dirty, filthy boy, haven't you? Tell me the truth.
OK! FINE! You'd better not mess it up.
no subject
Date: 2006-07-03 09:28 am (UTC)*moans* Oh, God, I'm such a terrible person. *pounces*
I won't mess it up! We'll save Fred and then raise her to be as clever as me and as confident as you only less slutty. Oh, should we have her neutered just in case?
no subject
Date: 2006-07-03 09:34 am (UTC)*spanks* Did I say you could pounce? Hmmm? What have I taught you about being polite and asking nicely? *spanks again* You're a very, very naughty boy.
Neutering might be helpful, yes.
no subject
Date: 2006-07-03 11:20 am (UTC)*mewls*
no subject
Date: 2006-07-03 11:45 am (UTC)*kisses it better*
no subject
Date: 2006-07-03 11:49 am (UTC)*emo orgasm stuff*
no subject
Date: 2006-07-03 11:50 am (UTC)*is pleased*
Good boy. You owe me one.
no subject
Date: 2006-07-03 11:53 am (UTC)*happysigh*
no subject
Date: 2006-07-03 11:55 am (UTC)*kisses your forehead*
no subject
Date: 2006-07-03 12:04 pm (UTC)I have issues.
no subject
Date: 2006-07-03 12:09 pm (UTC)I am going to help you clear those up, just you wait. Even if I have to beat them out of you.
no subject
Date: 2006-07-03 12:13 pm (UTC)*eeps*
no subject
Date: 2006-07-03 12:22 pm (UTC)Trust me. I know what I'm doing. It won't hurt
much.no subject
Date: 2006-07-03 12:53 pm (UTC)I don't like my issues
no subject
Date: 2006-07-03 12:54 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-07-03 12:57 pm (UTC)I think I have a thing for Penelope.
no subject
Date: 2006-07-03 01:00 pm (UTC)(no subject)
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